Add state to message lanes (#2214)

* add LaneState enum and a field to lanes data

* use OptionQuery in InboundLanes and OutboundLanes

* ensure that lanes are opened when accessing them

* an option to specify opened lanes in genesis config + fixed tests

* added PR reference to TODO

* fix failing benchmarks

* spelling

* get_or_init_data -> data

bump Substrate, Polkadot and Cumulus (#2223)